Gotta knock

aflavoredlime @ 2008-05-05T22:11:00

2008-05-06T02:13:51Z

got tickets to see She Wants Revenge and Be Your Own Pet

going with tyler and kacper. kacper and tyler. should be interesting.

please don't move. i don't know what i'd do without you around now. i met you and we became best friends within months. i havent had a friend like you in years...i almost cried when you told me you would move. dont think im selfish. i know you want to do it to get away from everything here, but you can still forget about him if you dont move, right? besides...i wanted to get a house with you and everything...

aflavoredlime @ 2008-04-27T21:56:00

2008-05-06T01:57:59Z

You've never been so scared that you would screw something up so completely.

Lying there you can feel your heart pounding in your throat, almost as if you'd see it on the bed next to you any minute. The more you think, the more you know you're fucking terrified and you don't think you're the only one that felt that way. You know -- or hope, they feel the same way.

It's just sleeping next to someone.

But when you're scared to move any closer, it means everything in the world at that exact moment.

It's getting a horrible night sleep, even though it's the best night ever. They're warm and soft and they take up less of the bed than you thought. And when you reach out and touch a body that's so like your own but so so unfamiliar and get a chill down your spine when they reach back, you know -- you hope they feel the same petrified, gut-retching way you do.

And for a minute you can feel their heart beating just as fast as yours. And they're moving towards you and you're closing your eyes and suddenly there's a noise, and the moment is gone. It's lost. Your heart drops and you can almost, but not quite feel theirs drop too, into that same bottomless pit of fucking terrified that's looming under the bed you're sleeping on.

And in hours its morning and despite pretending to sleep, neither of you have. You're tired and frustrated and everyone's up and about and there's that awkward tension drifting between you two.

And. And. And.

And suddenly,

you kiss.

aflavoredlime @ 2008-01-01T20:38:00

2008-01-02T01:39:30Z

hmm. fun new years. somehow I feel like it will come back and bite me in the ass, though.

aflavoredlime @ 2007-11-12T11:40:00

2007-11-12T16:51:22Z

Yesterday after having a very enlightening conversation on the phone with Floyd and playing apples to apples with Michelle and Rebecca, I wandered over to Mary's to play with her kitten. I also sat in her bathtub for twenty minutes while she and Tali argued over who got to cut my hair, eventually winding up with a haircut that would have cost me around $40 bucks and looked great. "Its getting kind of mullet-y in the back" Tali said, so she went at it with scissors and Mary took her razor to it to feather the edges. Hobbes, the kitten, was enjoying jumping in the tub and playing with the stray hair, though he had a couple of spills and tumbles as claws don't grip porcelain all too well. It was laughable, but sadly cute. We then curled up and watched My Big Fat Greek Wedding as Tali and I exploded over how cute Hobbes is when he sleeps. "Kittens have two modes...on and off." Mary said, as to why we can move him around while he sleeps and he wont wake up. "You're the only man in my life," She told him, and I laughed, because it was all too true. I'm not sure why this is ending up sounding like a story, because I didn't mean for it to, but thats okay.
I'll go backwards in time instead of forwards. Michelle and I went to a concert on Friday to see Dar Williams. We didn't know who the opening act was until we got there, and that wasnt even too much help as we didn't know if "Chris Pureka" was a guy or a girl. When Chris stepped out, Michelle and I look at each other and go, "He's cute". Then Chris sings. "He has a high voice" turns into "He's a girl!". We fell in love at first sight. So, if you have a chance, listen to Chris Pureka, her voice is lovely and even though I'm not a huge fan of that genre of music (folkish), I still love it.
I spent Saturday cleaning and reorganizing my room because most people were gone. We were going to play apples to apples then, but people canceled and stuff.
That is my weekend.
Here are some pictures of my hair. Ignore the sort of emo style of pictures. My roommate wasn't around to let me be a camera whore, so I had to take them myself.
Here's the front.
Here's the side.
Here's the back.

aflavoredlime @ 2007-11-03T15:51:00

2007-11-03T19:48:40Z

Hmm. I'm not really sure what's happening in my life right now.

aflavoredlime @ 2007-08-21T20:05:00

2007-08-22T00:01:54Z

sooo excited

but so sad to leave too

college'll be fun

aflavoredlime @ 2007-08-06T20:37:00

2007-08-07T00:34:29Z

little better.

thankyou

aflavoredlime @ 2007-08-04T17:12:00

2007-08-04T21:09:52Z

i fucked everything up

and i dont think i can fix it this time.

imsosorry

aflavoredlime @ 2007-07-02T22:06:00

2007-07-03T02:06:28Z

Wake up, my love
Never thought youd make me, break me
Now I'm up, from below
Such a brilliant star you are

And will your love keep burning baby?
Burn a hole right through my eyes
You saw that short times feel like no time
And I thought you oughta know

I'm so far gone now I've been running on empty
I'm so far gone now, do you wanna take me on?
Do you wanna take me on?

Do...
Do you...
Do you know...
Do you know how long I've waited?
To look up, from below
Just to find someone like you
And will your love light burn me, baby?
Burn a hole right through my heart
I think I might just trust you maybe
But I'm not sure
I'm not sure I'd wanna know

I'm so far gone now I've been running on empty
I'm so far gone now, do you wanna take me on?
I'm so far gone now I've been running on empty
I'm so far gone now, do you wanna take me on?
Do you wanna take me on?

I think you can make me, girl
Could make me and take my life
I know you can break me, girl
Take all of me
All of me

Wake up, my love
Never thought you'd make me, break me
Now I'm up, from below
Such a brilliant star you are

I'm so far gone now I've been running on empty
I'm so far gone now, do you wanna take me on?
I'm so far gone, I've been running on empty
I'm so far gone now, do you wanna take me on?
Do you wanna take me... on?

(1.I'm so running over my texting bill. I owe too much money.)
(2.Camp kinda takes it out of me.)
(3.Why do I go and hide when I feel like thing are my fault?)
(4.Far too often I feel like things are my fault.)
(5.You're getting to know me too well. I feel vulnerable.)

But this is living.

aflavoredlime @ 2007-06-19T21:34:00

2007-06-20T01:31:11Z

I feel like today just...wasn't worth the effort of getting out of bed.

aflavoredlime @ 2007-05-20T23:26:00

2007-05-21T03:23:51Z

well, the play's over.

its kinda sad, and kinda good at the same time. the cast, however, was the best cast ever. everyone was so tight and i have so many more people im tight with now and so many plans for things to do and im so excited. i made so many new friends!

and got a bunch of new music too!

now, i will actually have some time in my life, which is good.

aflavoredlime @ 2007-05-10T22:10:00

2007-05-11T02:07:16Z

Here's my life's soundtrack. Brought to you with rather useless commentary as well.

Jacked from mineapostasy

1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie.

Opening Credits:
Tired of lying in the sunshine, staying home to watch the rain. And you are young and life is long and there is time to kill today.
"Time" - Pink Floyd
Uhm. I guess it works. God knows I love Pink Floyd.

Birth:
But I won't cry for yesterday: there's an ordinary world somehow I have to find.
"Ordinary World" - Duran Duran
Not really a...birth song, but I still like it.

First day at school:
If I saw you dancing I would spin you around, spin you around, turn your world upside down.
"Spin You Around!" - Puddle of Mudd
Again, not really appropriate, but still a good song.

Falling in Love:
Midnight wish blow me a kiss, I'll blow one to you, Make like this, Try to pretend it's true.
"Blown A Wish" - My Bloody Valentine
I guess, if love's...fake? I guess that makes sense.

Fight Song:
The look in his eye said "Brother what are you going to do with a 9mm and a three piece suit?" They look to one another and say "Hey motherfucker, who's the fool?"
"9mm and a Three Piece Suit" - Catch 22
Mm. One of my favorite songs. And ska...perfect fighting music.

Breaking Up:
I'm here to blow it sky high and let it fly, Time waits for no one and that is why, I'm going out of my head.
"Lo-Fi" - The Exies
The title is more appropriate.

School Dance:
This fire is out of control: I'm going to burn this city, Burn this city.
"This Fire" - Franz Ferdinand
I guess...hell, I dance around to it. Perhaps we set the school on fire. It is a movie, after all.

Life:
So you just sit there, stuck, afraid to risk reality, Afraid to cause yourself more pain, to face insanity. But nothing ventured, nothing gained. You see... your fear's your cage.
"Do You Call My Name" - RA
Goddamn. Such a good song. A little cynical for my life, I guess. But...maybe not.

Mental Breakdown:
Did someone whisper? I'm really not so sure. I could've been asleep. Is everyone this frightened? Are there more like me? There's just got to be.
"Linoleum" - tweaker
PERFECT song for a mental breakdown. Mmm. I love tweaker.

Driving:
All praise the Circuit Breaker that circulates through your walls / And appalls all who call / I brawl, maul, and maim / We bless and destroy with strength still out of range
"Lady Venom" - Swollen Members
And I could never say no to Swollen Members. Hah.

Flashback:
I wrote more postcards than hooks, I read more maps than books. Feel like every chance to leave is another chance I should have took.
"I Will Play My Game Beneath The Spin Light" - Brand New
I always liked Brand New's lyrics.

Wedding:
You keep on begging for more, I've been there before, Knocking on the same door. It's when hate turns to love and love to hate, faith to doubt and doubt to faith.
"Beyond Redemption" - HIM
Hell, if I get to have any song play at my wedding, it'll be an HIM song. Or a wedding to Ville Valo.

Birth Of Child:
I swear we need to find some comfort in this run down place, to preach the cup of this constant state that we live in.
"Writing On The Walls" - Underoath
A really fucked up birth, most likely.

Final Battle:
Seems clear to me you've never known me, doubt everything you've never shown me.
"The Idiot Box" - Shadows Fall
Well, Shadows Fall is appropriate, I guess.

Death Scene:
Somebody hurts you so you're hurting me, the only way it was meant to be as the lights of neon slowly dim. I can read in flesh everywhere you've been.
"Sleeping With Lions" - The 69 Eyes
Makes sense. Sort of. Some of the other lyrics too. Niiice song. Soft.

Funeral:
I´m not living in the past for you, I´ve gotta learn my way through. Just wrap your troubles in dreams, it ain't that hard it seems.
"Wrap Your Troubles in Dreams" - The 69 Eyes
It makes me laugh how they came up twice -- in a row. I love them.

Ending Credits:
"Szerelem" - Stellamara
Lovely song. Makes me cry. So...nice, I guess?

aflavoredlime @ 2007-05-08T20:02:00

2007-05-08T23:59:10Z

aflavoredlime @ 2007-05-06T00:02:00

2007-05-06T03:59:53Z

NeverEver013: what if the sedation doesnt work?
NeverEver013: or like...i dont wake up?
NeverEver013: or if something goes wrong?
NeverEver013: what if they put the tube thing down the wrong thing, and it goes into my lungs?
NeverEver013: what if it they push to hard and it goes through my chest and to the outside
TenebrousTemplar: Your question to me is then:
TenebrousTemplar: What happens if everything conspires to make me dead.

aflavoredlime @ 2007-05-02T23:16:00

2007-05-03T03:39:26Z

oh hey. i hate my school. i hated today, but hey, i got to meet bill clinton. and a spider jumped on his shirt. and he gave us advice for college next year. and i got to shake his hand.

and that was pretty cool.

and it makes up for my school sucking.

aflavoredlime @ 2007-04-22T22:33:00

2007-04-23T02:32:45Z

ahaha oh god im such a wuss. why am i such a wuss sometimes?
itd be nice to be as strong as you.

in other news weekend was nice. im so done with school. only one more week before i paint everyday, for a month. and we get to meet clinton, which should be fun.

i just found out the 69 came out with a new cd in march. of course, i downloaded it and it will be all i listen to for a good month. YAY.

uhm. yeah. i should sleep.

aflavoredlime @ 2007-04-21T01:51:00

2007-04-21T05:49:35Z

whyyyy the fuck am i up at two in the morning?

in other news, i have to get an endoscopy, and i'm not looking forward to that.

in other other news, i want a snake.

aflavoredlime @ 2007-04-14T21:24:00

2007-04-15T02:46:06Z

THE TV KEYWORD MEME
• Go to IMDB.com and look up 10 of your favorite TV shows.
• Post three official IMDB "Plot Keywords" for these 10 picks.
• Have your friends guess the show names.

1) Homoeroticism, stupidity, vomit (Jackass)
2) US Navy, detective, murder investigation (NCIS)
3) Forensic science, character name in title, Washington, D.C. (Bones)
4) Cane, character name in title, hospital (House)
5) Sex crime, NY City, Detective (Law and Order: SVU)
6) Comic book, explosion, antenna (Invader Zim)
7) Time travel, telephone, satire (Doctor Who)
8) Style, photoshoot, challenge (America's Next Top Model)
9) Pineapple, psychic, best friends (Psych)
10)Post-it, life after death, grief (Dead Like Me)

aflavoredlime @ 2007-04-12T22:29:00

2007-04-13T02:26:41Z

I normally dont do this...but...it was just too good:

Google Maps meme:

--Go to maps.google.com.
--Click on "get Directions".
--From New York
--To London

--And read line # 23.

If you laugh, repost this.

aflavoredlime @ 2007-03-27T00:42:00

2007-03-27T04:45:58Z

Bahahaha sooooo. Im having a better week. Maybe I'm just delerious from sleep.

I left a silly message on Boo's answering machine. "And we should do something this week...like...any day. Today, even. Or tomorrow. Or any day. But not saturay...but...actually yes saturday. Just. The day isnt good. So yeah. Saturday. But yeah, you should call me." Annnnd it went on like that for quite a bit. Her cell broke. So sad!

Uuuh. I have developed a new obsession, as I was telling Boo....though I didn't put it so gracefully. XD The show Wildboyz makes me laugh. You know the guys from Jackass, Steve-o and Chris Pontius? Yeaaaah. They make me laugh. Some strange obsession with Pontius. He's silly.

House is on tomorrow. A new one! I have "home" written on my hand because I cant think and write and talk at the same time. Again, whilst i was on the phone with Boo.

Tomorrow has...something in store. I dont know? Call me, if you have any plans. CAUSE I WAS SO BORED TODAY.
Wednesday mall with boo at like one, but not sure about after that.
Thursday up to Baltimore with me, I think. maybe friday?
Work on Saturday. During the day. BUT IM FREE AT NIGHT.
And Sunday? Maybe some homework. Most likely will never ever ever happen.

SO IM IN A GOOD MOOD.

uuuuuuh. and on a vaguely weird note. my mother thinks me drinking vinegar is good for my stomach. so yeah. its like...chugging salad dressing. its weird.

haha im taping wildboyz tonight. im such a nerd.

aflavoredlime @ 2007-03-14T23:02:00

2007-03-15T03:00:10Z

best icon everrrrrrrr

spring break sooon

im 18 today!

im going to get my hair cut after i graduate. it will be fun. and by cut, i mean by a lot.

aflavoredlime @ 2007-03-07T23:32:00

2007-03-08T04:32:26Z

Im so done with school. Im so done with everything here.

I used to think i wouldn't get tired of the people. I have. Really, I can't lie. I'm so sick of some of the people that I want to just get up and quit now. I'm sick of being treated like something worth being used. And no, I don't want their drama. I'm DONE.

On another note, I've been in a horrible mood all week, so yeah. That might be the general tone of this, and if it is, I'm sorry.

aflavoredlime @ 2007-02-28T20:31:00

2007-03-01T01:31:44Z

I remember mineapostasy doing this a while back.

Got into:
Drew
Mary Washington
Guilford
American ('08)
Gettysburg

Waitlisted:
JMU
(thats what I get for showing no interest)

Declined:
Skidmore
(thats what I get for showing no interest)

Never got around to:
Trinity (IE)
Corcoran
Longwood
(oops?)

aflavoredlime @ 2007-02-12T20:06:00

2007-02-13T01:04:43Z

I'm done. Im sick of putting in effort and getting shit back.

This is far from angst. This is anger. Gee thanks, and its hard to get me angry.

I'm done with being insulted and walking on broken glass.

I really, really don't care anymore.

Is it sad that i say that?

At this point, I don't care.

Sinta's right.

Fuck them.

A friendship that is based on nothing is worth nothing. I'm done with being <i>insulted</i> and degraded. I'm not dealing with this anymore. You're own your own.

aflavoredlime @ 2007-02-11T00:31:00

2007-02-11T05:30:32Z

teehee. i was having a horribly horrible night until i decided to read some of the files on my computer, which i do now and again, and now I'm all warm and fuzzy inside.

"Even now, after recounting it this way, I can feel that I can't adequately describe the way that I felt in that one moment. "

Im so not as good with words. I woulda been like "and so yeah i felt stuff but i cant describe it." hah.